Monday morning lurks in the darkness…waiting…
I recently learned the term “Sunday Scaries” from a group of friends. They’re the creeping anxiety so many employees get as Monday morning inches closer. The same anxiety I remember feeling in many of my former jobs. And my friends have ‘em.
I’m grateful that Sunday Scaries are just a memory for me, but I know they’re a reality for many people. The fixer in me wants to give every one of them a hug and help them find them a new job, but since that’s not quite realistic, I thought I’d take a moment to address the CEOs in the building because YOU HAVE THESE AMAZING, HARD-WORKING, ROCKSTAR EMPLOYEES AND YOU GUYS, THEY HATE SUNDAYS AND IT’S NOT OK!!!
So this one’s for the big-hearted, well-intentioned CEOs who have freaking fantastic employees who just might be slowly burning out and not even know it. Here’s what I’ve learned about Sunday Scaries…
It’s Possible to Love Your Job and Still Have The Sunday Scaries
My friends taught me this one. My gut reaction, when I heard that my friends were regularly experiencing this phenomenon, was to assume they disliked their jobs and needed to get out. This may be true in some cases, but to my astonishment, my friends said they actually LOVED their jobs!
So what’s going on there?
Well, from what I can tell, they’re stressed by their jobs, but they have bosses they like and respect, who have good intentions and treat them with kindness. They work for companies where the work they do matters and where their contributions make a big difference to the team. AND they’re hard-working employees who get a lot of satisfaction from doing the work and doing it well.
My hunch is that all of these “pros” make the Sunday Scaries an acceptable tradeoff. For now.
CEO Action Step: You may be a great leader and truly care about your employees. If you’re reading this, I’m betting on it. You probably do a wonderful job of serving your clients well and your team feels like they’re making a difference. This is all very very important.
Also? You need to make sure your rockstar employees are ok.
Many A-Players value being “easy going” or “low maintenance,” so you may not get the full story on the first go-around. Take them to lunch and get specific. Ask them if they feel a bit anxious on Sunday nights. Assure them that you know it’s not a sign that they don’t like their job or are unhappy.
If they do, ask them how they cope and what problems it’s causing. Don’t try to fix the problem, just LISTEN. Be curious. The whole goal of the conversation should be to understand, not to fix. The truth is, they may not even know what needs fixing because...
Our Coping Strategies Stop Us from Understanding the Root Causes of Our Scaries
I don’t think that Sunday Scaries are always a sign that there’s something wrong with the job or the company. But I AM sure that they’re a way for our bodies to tell us that something is off. So many of us spend the majority of our lives in our heads, completely ignoring the messages from our bodies. Just like a fever indicates that our body is under attack and we need to rest, that creeping anxiety on Sunday evenings is our body trying to tell us something. But how often do we stop and really listen?
When we feel that familiar sense of dread, we often jump straight to coping strategies to get through, like...
Running through a laundry list in our heads of what needs to get done and so ...
Getting snippy with the kids and/or our partner until we turn to...
Polishing off that bottle of wine or carton of ice cream, while we’re ...
Binging on Netflix to numb the pain until we finally pass out at 1am, which doesn’t stop us from...
Tossing and turning all night as we imagine the worst case scenario for everything that’s going to happen this week.
These are all patterns of behavior that we may have adopted over time to deal with icky feelings, but none of them actually resolve the core issues that are causing those feelings in the first place. They will also have a severe impact on your employees’ health, happiness, and relationships, both in and out of the workplace.
CEO Action Step: Nope. Still not time to start fixing. Once you’re aware that your rockstar employee is experiencing the Sunday Scaries, it’s time to dig into identifying the problem(s).
Ask your employee if they notice any patterns about what causes them to feel the most stressed or anxious about work. They may need some time to reflect before they can pinpoint it, so don’t rush to identify the problem(s). (Seriously, don’t rush. We CEOs really hate the part where we aren’t actively solving, don’t we?)
When you spend more time digging into the problem, you might discover…
They’re bad at setting boundaries and feel like they’re a bad employee if they say no.
They repeatedly set unrealistic timelines and overestimate what they can handle.
You’ve put too many responsibilities on their plate for any one human to handle.
There’s a difficult coworker who’s making their life hell.
They’re lacking in some critical skills they need to perform their job.
There are inefficiencies in the way your team is working.
The list goes on and on, but you won’t know the right action to take until you can first uncover what’s going on. Sometimes, you may find a problem that requires some outside help. Whatever it is, and however you and your employee decide to go about addressing it, be sure to let them know they have your support, because…
You Can’t Afford to Let Your Most Dedicated, Talented Employees Burn Out
I’ve worked with enough CEOs to know that the cost of replacing a rockstar employee is high. It can have ripple effects that last for months, both in terms of team morale and productivity.
Often, you can get by for a long time by providing good leadership and a caring work culture - even if your A-Players are stressin’. But at some point, they will burn out. Whether it’s a literal, physical burn-out or the realization that they can find a less overwhelming job elsewhere, it’s not a risk you want to take.
Because, most importantly, you’re the kind of CEO who actually does care about the wonderful humans that call your business home.
CEO Action Step: Ask yourself, “Am I 100% sure that my A-Players are handling the stresses of the job?” If the answer is no, it’s time to take action and start asking the hard questions.
Some employees will thrive on high pressure, but many people don’t, and knowing who does and who doesn’t is information that will ultimately help you mitigate risks to your company. Your people are your greatest business asset and it’s up to you to make sure they have what they need to be successful. Let’s get rid of the Sunday Scaries, one business at a time.